My wife tried that about six years ago. Made her own spores. It did not work out. But maybe six years later the instructions are better…
Proper teacher is the rub. I have used acupuncture for pain and there are good and not-so-good acupuncturists (even here in Manhattan). It’s as much art as science. But it is worth researching.
There has been an explosion in online vendors selling liquid culture syringes, which are much easier for a beginner to work with than spores. Basically, this is a syringe with live mycelium growing in media. Using this eliminates the need for spores to germinate and mate, cutting the time for initial growth and reducing the chances of infection.
These are technically illegal in most states, but no one seems to care enough to shut it down.
My wife is the expert here. I will ask her to re-investigate magic mushrooms.
In my family we have high histamine. It has been a serious problem for my wife and 2 of the kids. They are all very high achievers and maybe the anxiety helps? In any case when it gets away you have to get it under control. There are diets that will tell you what to eat to avoid histamine. It can be tested but there are several tests and it’s very easy to do it wrong. There is a book:Nutrient Power (heal your biochemistry and heal your brain). And there is a company that gives the tests recommended in the book and consults about the test results. Off the top of my head I think it’s Mensa Medical in Chicago.
The book is cheap and the diet isn’t too bad, you can read on the internet and probably hack your way through on the cheap. Good Luck,
Why are you averse to SSRIs and benzos?
Is not Zen the most purely mindful meditation? Please elaborate on how you define Zen versus mindfulness meditation, so that we can see the difference you may mean to emphasize clearly.
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Good question - the term mindfulness gets thrown around a lot and is used in different contexts. What I was referring to are the mindfulness folks who teach you to be mindful of what you are doing - meaning be fully paying attention to this or that - whatever it is you are doing or they are having you do (in meditation or otherwise). Zazen - Zen meditation is concerned with observing the self - i.e. the one who is being mindful. A lot of the way mindfulness is taught only reinforces the perspective of self and does not lead you to no-self. No-self is the goal of Zazen and no-self is not mindful as the term is used these days. No-self is pure awareness - pure consciousness.
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so, mindful is fully concentrating on one thing, while Zen is fully concentrating on one thing, which happens to be the self, which however does not exist? 
Zen for beginners is also breathing, and then it is a long path, via open monitoring, toward deep contemplation, toward a non mysterious understanding of no-self. For people with depression or anxiety, start with mindfulness and breathing, because jumping to the “darker” (profound) Zen stages unprepared might just increase anxiety, darkness, existential doom, suicidal ideation.
“ while Zen is fully concentrating on one thing, which happens to be the self, which however does not exist?” Not quite - as we say in Zen, the minute we open our mouths to describe it, we’re wrong 
. You are not concentrating in Zazen - quite the opposite (though we talk about concentrated mind - it is not the same as concentration in the context you presented). Most Zazen begins with following the breath so there you are correct. As far as going deeper, my belief is your mind won’t take you anywhere that you are not prepared to handle. Also, we don’t say the self doesn’t exist (this is broadly misunderstood) - it’s just that the belief that there is a permanent (persistent), abiding self (an agent) is a delusion. The liberation of no-self promotes deep gratitude and a reverence for all life - I can’t imagine it would lead to suicidal ideation but this is beyond my expertise. If you are in that sort of condition, you should be under the care of a professional - Zen is not a substitute for psychotherapy or psychiatry but it can be a useful adjunct imo. In fact, quite a lot of the students in my Sangha are therapists 
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That “the path” leads to where many cannot handle it and become depressed or religious or suicidal is a wisdom found by many a sage. Perhaps you did not go there yet?
Also, if something cannot be defined properly, if we cannot talk about it except for all attempts leading to confronting delusions, well then that thing cannot meaningfully be said to exist. That self, like the “real world” (“real” as in the seemingly counterfactual definiteness of the physical), do not exist! The illusions exist.
Hello,In Germany a lot of people use Saint John’s wort for moderate anxiety with relatively success
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Hi I sometimes use full spectrum CBN for sleep (Humacology brand in Australia) its very effective. For anxiety I am mainly walking, swimming at beach and doing the free Calm Relax breathing exercise a few times a day. I also find magnesium with taurine helps- oh and a big thing is to get gut healthy. So I have plenty good nutrition, fibre etc. Sleep also helps with anxiety.
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Because I tried both with no effect. Plus, regarding SSRIs, anxiety is not depression. Indeed, although they are taken together as mood disorders, anxiety and depression are not nearly the same.
While I have not tried CBN, I have tried everything else on your list.
And I use Seroquel for sleep. Works well.
I have read that St John’s Wort is not safe. But maybe I am confusing it with Kava Kava. I will look more closely at St John’s Wort.
St John’s Wort is mainly used for depression. And there might be some effect on anxiety. But the evidence is not clear on that. I currently only take Seroquel for sleep, so no drug interactions. But the evidence for anxiety seems slim.
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I’m in a similar boat and am very sympathetic. Just about every good suggestion has already been mentioned, and some of them have helped me a bit also (lithium and exercise in particular). CBT also helped to some extent when I was in my 30s, growing in my faith helped a lot more as I got older (just mentioning as part of my story, not suggesting to anyone else), but getting on testosterone replacement largely squashed my anxiety almost instantaneously a couple years ago. That’s when I realized how much of it had been a hormonal problem that started with puberty.
About a month into TRT, the internal upwelling of constant anxiety vanished except when my estradiol started to get too high. In that case, I would take a small dose of an aromatase inhibitor or a DHT-derived compound and feel better again. Since starting TRT, I feel pretty calm most of the time. It’s just another possible puzzle piece to consider investigating.
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Have you considered clonodine? It is an antihypertensive, non-sedating but not a beta-blocker. It is an antiadrenergic medication (α2A-adrenergic receptor agonist) which can be taken 2 or even 3 times a day, also comes in a transdermal patch. Used in childhood anxiety, ADHD, autism, tics, hyperarousal and more. Wikipedia has an ok page about how it is used. Of course there may be side effects, etc etc you’d have to work with your provider to see if it might suit you.
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